I was told one time that I was "too nice". I'm not sure if they meant it as a compliment or not, but I have to wonder - can you be too nice?
I can see no point in kicking a person when they're down. I can't see a point in pushing down a person that is on a high. Does that make me too nice?
I know during my life, I have said hurtful things. I know during my life I have taken it upon myself to drag another person down. I've called people liars when they probably weren't lying.
During my life, hurtful things have been said to me. During my life people have brought me down when I was enjoying life. I've been called a liar when I wasn't lying. All those things hurt; but that was the person's intention.
When I did those things it was probably because my life wasn't that great at the time or the person was experiencing something I so badly wanted but didn't get. Rather than be happy for them, I chose to bring them to my level. Which, in turn, is the same reason someone would do that to me.
Having it done to you causes hurt; and though I can forgive those individuals..I don't forget it. And that's the key - I know how it made me feel, so why would I do it to another? The "Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you." is true. I know that being nice does not mean everyone will like me nor do I expect them to; but if they cannot respond nicely then I actually feel sorry for them...life must be very bad for them.
I'm reading Rick Warren's God's Power To Change Your Life. In it he teaches:
What I think determines what I feel and What I feel determines how I act.
If you act resentful it's because you feel resentful and you feel that way because you are thinking resentful thoughts. Proverbs 4:23 "Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts." I find this a powerful message.
He goes on to say that we cannot control all circumstances in our lives but we can control how we respond to them. Does it make you a bitter person or a better person? He says that God uses the situations that others mean for bad in our lives. God uses painful situations for good. It's how he molds us into his image and for the purpose he has for us.
I think this poem says it all:
End Of The Day
Is anybody happier because you passed this way
Does anyone remember that you spoke to them today
The day is almost over, and its’ toiling time is through.
Is there anyone to utter now a kindly word of you
That you helped a single person of the many that you passed
Is a single heart rejoicing over what you did or said
Does one whose hopes were fading now with courage look ahead
Did you waste the day or use it Was it well or sorely spent
Did you leave a trail of kindness, or a scar of discontent
As you close your eyes in slumber, do you think that God will say
You have earned one more tomorrow by what you did today